Reviews for I Do Believe In Faeries

Reviews For: I Do Believe In Faeries - Reviews: Page 1 of 2

Inarra Lake 2008-02-03 ch 5,	abuseMan. I left me wanting to know what happened. I feel so bad for her, thinking her boyfriend's going to come back, and what about when new people move in? What then? Man, this is going on my favorites,along with you Solemn.
Disturbly 2007-08-21 ch 1,	abuseHello then. I had an opportunity to take a break from my writing (stories about elves with Toyotas and laser guns, incidentally) and checked out your profile. I was pleasantly surprised to find a veritable feast of intriguing stories. It took a while to choose where to begin, but this one's summary seemed a bit more interesting than the rest -- not that the others fell short by any great margin, mind. I'm pleased to say I wasn't disappointed; after giving it a read, I'm here to weigh in with my thoughts. Though it's not really my signature style, I'll mimic the format you used in your uber-helpful review; turnabout is foul play, after all. So, let's get to it... "I live alone. That’s how it’s always been. Just me and Gray in our little inner-city apartment." Good opener, though I confess it did give me pause at first. Your character says she lives alone, and a sentence later names a cohabitator. You later put it into context by identifying Gray as the cat, but that's a whole two paragraphs down. Never a good idea to start a story out with a bit of cognitive incoherence, but otherwise, a solid opening, that firmly anchor's the story in first person perspective (It just me, or do you hear an echo?). "Sometimes I bring his parentage up, but that usually makes him angrier. Maybe it would help if I didn’t think he was descended from goats." A clever line, delivered at just the right place. Personally, I would have substituted the word "ancestry"; I'd try to juxtapose the more formal term with the insulting sentiment to play up the humor. However, that's just my MO; I don't mean to suggest you should do it. "And by “stood”, I mean he dangled from Gray’s mouth, limp and lifeless. " Nice bit of BS there. No, wait, chillax! The initial's stand for "bait and switch"; you used to it good effect there (incidentally, I have a phobia of ampersands. Weird, huh?"). "It’s short for Graymalkin." I have no clue what you were referencing there; my loss. "It’s hard to keep your culture when you’re dead. " Another good line; I really like these sardonic observations. "She could argue the knob off a door or drink my step-dad under the table." Oh, so her grandma was Irish, and you characterize her as what? An irascible drunk. Well, Solemn Coyote, I happen to be of Irish descent, and I can tell you, that line... was pretty much spot on, and totally sweet besides. Erin Go-fucking Bragh, y'all! \m/ "I did contract work, graphic design, and that paid pretty well. " Ok, if I had seen that in almost any other author's piece, we would have had a problem; "computer programmer/ graphic artist" is, after all, one of the great Mary Sue occupations, behind Mercenary, Musician, and Highschool Student. However, you're so far from Mary Sueville here that I guess it's permissible, just this once. But only once. DO YOU HEAR ME!? Nah, I'm just jerking you around; don't know why I wasted either of our time by commenting on it. "The kettle snapped and hissed, and the fairy lay perfectly still. " The entire paragraph from that point is perfect perfection with a perfect-y coating; you reveal a lot of little humanizing traits about your character, but do so in a natural and subtle manner. Nice. "Then I took anther drink of hot chocolate and went to my computer." Ah-hah! Typo! Found a typo! Turns out you're only human after all; I was beginning to think you were some kind of AI, programmed to write ass-kickingfully. ""What I found was: teen fiction, porn, neo-mysticism, porn, rants about homosexuality, porn, and some flowery artwork. The artwork was pretty. The porn was disturbing." Ok. That line was just... I mean to say that it... It was just so... I love you. I mean that in a completely platonic way, in the context of my admiration of your work; but I mean it nonetheless. So, in summation, what I liked? Got a pencil and an hour? The whole thing was superbly done, with just enough touches of the mundane to offset the fantastic subject matter (there it goes again! Damned echo...), and witty and clever enough throughout that I've begun to view you as a potential Rival, and am putting serious thought into destroying you. Nothing personal, of course. What I didn't like? Not much; as I said, the cognitive stumbling block in the first line slowed me down, but you could rework it. You really don't describe much of the character's surroundings, leaving the reader to put their imagination to work in viewing her apartment and such. I realize, of course, you have to do that; considering the length and pacing of this, you would have destroyed the momentum if you'd mixed in a bunch of superfluous descriptions. Only speaking as a writer from a stylistic standpoint, I could never feel comfortable attempting to pull off the same thing; a kind of localized, king-hell OCD would kick in, forcing me to micro-manage the scene, throwing in details about the character's knicknacks and book collection. In other words, I would have butchered this; that's why I wouldn't tempt fate by going for something of it's brevity in the first place. I can't help but notice the protagonist is, at this point, unnamed; as many times as you commented on the same feature in SaSW, I was incensed (eh, more like mildly disconcerted) to see you display the same foible. Bad Coyote; no cookie. No cookie indeed. And finally, this was just too damn short! I suppose you brought it to a close at a natural stopping point, but as a reader, I'm not obliged to take my fiction fun-sized. I guess I'll have to read the rest of this and get back to you with one of my characteristic Meta-Reviews. At the moment, I've business to attend to; I drank some Nyquil a while ago, you see, and there seems to be some type of mechanical snake cavorting about my window. I am absolutely compelled to jump off my roof and try to wrest it to terra firma; I'll update you on how it went later. -Disturbly.
Burnt Bread 2007-04-02 ch 5,	abuseI would say you are a very, very boring person, but the fact that you managed to write about faeries in a way that makes them completely uninteresting is in itself interesting. The story was well written, though a bit dry. While reading, I didn't know whether to feel sleepy or amused. And even though every physical pointer says that it's very plain, I can't help but think that it's a very clever story somehow. Maybe because it was such a subversion of the whole concept of little people, it was interesting to read. I don't know. You should post more often :poke:. Bread
this account is no longer o... 2007-03-26 ch 5,	abuseSolemn Coyote, I'm really not sure what to think when I read this story. I've read it six times and have no idea what to make of it. You were right; it certainly isn't your average fairytale. But I enjoyed it, that's for sure. It was very well writen, and I think that you ended it in just the right way for the style of the story. But I wish it hadn't ended quite so abruptly. I don't think I'll ever read a fairytale n the same way ever again.
EnderWinner 2007-01-25 ch 5,	abuseHopefully fictionpress won't eat this review. The story was very well written. I admire how you were able to keep the main character's voice the same throughout the entire piece. That's something I sometimes struggle with, so good job. You also did quite well in making this an 'anti-fairytale', so to speak. It isn't your average fantasy, and it rather reminded me of Ray Bradbury at times. I like the style and interpretation of the fantasy genre you've gone for. It's different, but in a good way. It nearly falls into a 'speculative fiction', ack horrible term, category, but that's only for those who like labels. Personally, I don't. See, your muse speaks to you. Now you just need a leash for her.
EnderWinner 2007-01-24 ch 2,	abuse"The pictures were pretty, the porn was disturbing." I like the cynical humour. It made me chuckle when I read it. I like your writing style, your muse is kind to you. I'll be sure to look at the other stories as well. Looks like and interesting story, and I'll get through the rest of it when I have the time.
breana 2007-01-20 ch 5,	abuseHmm... that was... interesting. I mean, it gave a new outlook on the whole fairy thing... and it was well-written, funny at points... but it seemed kind of... abruptly ended. Almost pointless. I don't know- I enjoyed reading it, but I felt kind disappointed by the ending. Like I said, it was well-written... shrug I guess I'm just being picky.
Gathering Crows 2007-01-14 ch 5,	abuseInteresting. I like how big people are myths to the little..-er people. I also liked how things didn't resolve happily ever after.
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-14 ch 5,	abuseChapter 5, the last one by the looks of it. :( "Cats are never there when I need them. People are always underfoot when I want to be left alone. Story of my life. Or, at least, it’s been the story of these last couple days. I searched thoroughly but Gray was nowhere to be found. He’d apparently left the apartment for fairyland again. I sighed." - again, I cracked up when beginning to read the chapter. You have a talent for making me do that, apparently. The part about skipping town and leaving the whole fairy problem to the landlord is a nice touch, especially that the thing that keeps her back is Gray, the only creature she's ever gotten along with. Shows how much she cares about others. And the description about how she knocks on her own bathroom door. The fairy has more or less gotten herself her temporarily own place to live. “I think you can help me help you,” I said, “Help me help you help me get my apartment back. - ah, the classic help-I-got-to-think-to-understand-what-is-meant-here line. It wasn't too complicated though, so I survived :) “I don’t want to.” “Neither do I, but I’m willing to make that sacrifice.” - ah, we love cynicism :) "Well, it turned out I’d been wrong all those years. It wasn’t just people. Faeries did it too." - poor protagonist, forced to listen to somebody else's jabbering, which she has no interest whatsoever to listen to. Or answer, for that matter. Feel my compassion... “There’s a lot of dust. Do you clean back here?” She asked from behind the couch. No, I don’t ever have to go back there. “The cabinet here’s empty. Don’t you buy movies?” No, they cost money. “You’re almost out of dish-soap. You need a refill.” Right. That’s what I’m worried about right now. - again, the lovely cynicism. Me likes :) “B-student. The back of a pickup. No.” I’ve never cared much about small talk, and I’ve never had a lot of practice with it. - love the way she refuses to elaborate any about herself. “I meant, what’s it like being you?” “I’ll be even better when this is over.” - she's just overflowing with positive energy this girl, isn't she? ;) I like how unceremoniously their farewell is. Push fairy through hole, bye bye, hope I never see you again. Ever. "In the morning I resolved to find the landlord and make on last joke about his parentage. Then, I promised myself, I would tell him that I was moving out." - it's a bit sad ending to the story. No more fairies. No more sarcastic remarks about how things are so much for the worse when fairies are around. And fairy lady will never really know that Matthew was killed by Gray (she'll probably figure it out anyway, and it might not be such a good thing that she figures it out and has a chance to come back. She'll probably develop some crazy plan and kill Gray somehow. Or not...). Anyway. One tiny little error in the joke line. I think it's supposed to be 'one last joke', not 'on last joke'. Great job with this story! Again, I can't truely express how well done this story was, and how many times I laughed out loud (and also, all the times sniggered and snorted and so on). I will have a go at some of your other stories as well, but not right now. This isn't the last you've seen of Awaking kills the Dream dramatic music.(hey, that actually kinda rhymed too. I'm such a poet) Also, thank you for your review. I'll respond to that one later too, but first there is dinner to be had. ~Awaking kills the Dream
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-14 ch 4,	abuseThe opening line made me crack up again. I mean, you've got an unconscious fairy thingy beside your sink, and you say "I think you're bluffing"? Haha! "We've got important stuff to discuss. Whether or not you're going to curse me, for instance." Again, I cracked up. Stop being so calm all the time. (I was going to say rational, but decided against it). "where're my clothes?" - now there's some rationalism right there. That's the first thing I'd wonder too. Poor fairy lady. You wake up hurt and bruised, one arm is broken, and on top of that you're naked. How much worse can it get? Also, the, "oh, right. Magic"-part; I love it! :) "I got my BA is graphic design. What’s a fairy?” - love the retort, but there's a tiny spelling error. Think it's meant to be 'I got my BA in graphic design.' “I don’t bless cows. I’ve never blessed a cow. Is that what I’m supposed to do to appease you?” Heh, of course she's never blessed a cow. Really, who does that nowadays anyway? Honestly. Nice touch to explain what humans are to the miniature folk. And that they don't believe in each other's excistense. And the fairy person's logical thinking. "That's because you're unnaturally huge." Yes, of course. From your point of view at least. Again, nice description of why and how the protagonist can't interact normally with other people. And now you've made me want to make a parmesan and brandy-shrine, just because it's funny to call it a shrine. Not because I've accidently indirectly been responsible of the death of one fairy, and hurting another. I feel sorry for the little fairy man though. Just throwing him away like that. Aw... "At the very least, she would've been out of my way." Heh, yeah, people are a hassle to deal with, regardless of their size. And they mess up your precious daily routine. "It closed behind me. The door, I mean. Not the hallway." Haha, it cracks me up when small, not really all that neccessary explanations like that are added, and when it's done so nicely. But I feel sorry for the little fairy lady now (apart from the fact that the cat has made a mess out of her. But now she's probably even boyfriend-less.) I like cats. I just don't like Gray. He's almost a mean cat, not just cat cat. :P
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-14 ch 3,	abuseI said I was going to review each chapter, and I meant it...it's just that the wireless network keeps failing me everytime I try to submit a review, so now I'm on a whole different computer, which uses a whole different network! Woohoo! Booyah, all you downloading bastard school mates for making me unable to review when I want to because you're downloading all kind of crap when you're not supposed to! Ahem. Chapter three. It's nice to get to know a bit about the protagonist's past, and especially the way you delve deeper into the relationship to her grandmother. It kinda reminded me of Granny Aching and Tiffany's relationship from Wee Free Men, except that they were perhaps a bit more fond of each other :P(you better have read that Terry Pratchett book; it's one of the best ones yet. Or maybe I've just got a weak point for wee blue men in kilts...) The Faerie Encyclopedia was a nice touch, especially the bit about the Latin names, and how she felt about the book trying to trick her into believing. "The logical conclusion was that the faeries took him, and I hated it for being logical." Yes, don't we all. It's unpleasant to have to consider absurdities that all of a sudden aren't all that impossible as they used to be. Also, nice touch about her checking if the invisible hole in her side was making a mess on the couch, which it of course wasn't. It was just a feeling after all ;) And the nose-snatching line she says at the air, with no reply. The randomness, and not to mention the calmness she shows all the time! And of course, she checks if the internet has any solution for bringing back her cat, which it of course hasn't. It's all so well done :) "“Drop her right now.” I commanded. Gray gave me a long stare: the feline equivalent of a headshake. Cold fingers were crawling up my limbs, but a little corner of me was determined to be rational. “I am not happy with you.” Gray responded with an I-don’t-care flirt of his tail. I stepped forward. The woman in his mouth stirred. Gray turned around and took off down the corridor. I bolted after him." - possibly my favourite part in this chapter. So much is conveyed by so little said. And all the time, the protagonist is quite calm. No hysterics. Just a tiny hint of irritation. Lol :P ~Awaking kills the Dream
Sword On Fire 2007-01-13 ch 5, anon.	abuseInteresting. An eight-inch wide, inter-dimensional hole in the middle of her living room that can only be seen from a cat's height. That's an unexpected twist. You should let your character get a better apartment. And when I say that, I say it because my mental picture of her apartment is small, dark, badly decorated, in disrepair, and probably smelly. Please correct me if this is totally wrong.
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-13 ch 2,	abuseChapter two...again, what to point out when there are so many good things that ought to be mentioned? Actually I think this chapter is my favourite. The dream sequence is extremely well described. The pure absurdity of it all is enough to make even Shino laugh (he's from the manga/anime Naruto. Dunno if you've ever seen it, but let me just tell you this...if you ever meet anyone more serious and in so total lack of a sense of humour, you must let me know!). I can't point out what exactly is the better part of the dream descriptions. The landlord bit with hooves. The knocking on the door and the following dialogue. It's all so funny, and absured that I didn't know what to do! "It's the faeries." "We heard there was a party. We wanted to check it out." "We're all AA. How dare you!" "You should have left us a pizza. Charge, boys!" Ah, I was laughing so loud that people were staring at me (I was in the common room at my school. I'm living at the school I'm attending you see, and there were a few other people there with me...they knew I was strange, but still...some things can really freak people out, like random laughing from people they don't really know, it seems) Also, I like the way you describe the monotonous rituals of the protagonist's life. Wake up, make watery hot chocolate. Let out cat. Darn, where's the cat. Oh well. Heh, and the part about the not-there message that she is partially expecting to be there is also a nice touch. "PS, we have you cat." HAHA! ~Awaking kills the Dream
Awaking kills the Dream 2007-01-13 ch 1,	abuseI read your story yesterday, and in a very excited state I was leaving a long and random review. Sadly/luckily (for you) the internet failed at the exact same moment I pressed 'submit review'. That was a bummer...anyway, since your story is on a whole different level and quality than the stories I usually stumble over here on fictionpress, I actually wrote down the title and your name so that I could try and leave a review the next day (in other words, today). During the night I figured that each chapter actually deserves its own review, because there are so many things that can be commented on, and that's purely out of the joy it was to read this. I was laughing out loud at several places. I was also going to tell you that your writing reminded me extremely much about two of my favourite authors, namely Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams. But I've just read your profile page, so that kinda explains things. So kudos to you for managing to make your writing similair and making me laugh, not because the story is so tragically bad (I should talk...oh well, I am negotiating with my lovely beta so that I can improve my stories to a decent level at least, story-wise) but because it was so hilarious and had just the right ingredients to make me surprised and laughing. So there you are. You should be proud of yourself, you could be a profesional judging by this story ;) Anywho. It's difficult to point out what exactly are my favourite parts in the first chapter; there's so many of them! I could just make things easy for myself and say all of it. But I won't (though it's still true). I like the way you introduce your character as a self-declared hermit, and how she doesn't go along with other people (and especially not the landlord), and her relationship to her grandmother. Also, the addiction she has to using the internet as her life. Nothing to do, watch films, dead faerie, search the internet. Yeah, that sounds like an interesting life. And also, the whole part with describing the wait to see if the offerings would have any effect was really well described. (And the German Zombie film description was funny too). Uhm, there were other things that was great in the way to describe the main character, but they're difficult to point out. It's just the general feel of the chapter and the rest of the story I guess. Well done! ~Awaking kills the Dream Ps: the internet failed yet again when I hit submit this time too, but at least I had the sense enough to copy the text before I hit submit. Mwhahahaha, I got the upper hand now, cursed internet!
Sword On Fire 2007-01-11 ch 4, anon.	abuseGray killed her boyfriend, didn't he. I am starting to seriously dislike that cat. Please update again soon!

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