Finally found enough time to read this.
Anyways, the beginning was good: nicely written and giving the reader a visual on the happenings. The setting seems interesting and I'm intrigued as to how the plot will proceeded.
Overall it's a good start and I sense this story is going to be a good one, though short (apperently).
I'll read some more in the near future, when I'll have a bit more time.
Take care.

hey, I like. I like muchos. Not many poeple go for the post-apocalyptic scenarios in their storys :P
this is the first story where ive been this surprised so early on in the story for a long time. keep it up.
having said that, i do have a few criticisms. your writing is too flowery (at least for me), like when you were narrating the part with the baby crying for the first time, the bit about he was letting the world know he was born didnt really need to be there. it would have had the same effect without it, see? cos, you see, we (readers) arent idiots :P
anyway, I will read the rest of your story soon!

btw, you reviewed my story Mechanoid Five, but i couldnt be arsed to sign in :P (i know i cant really talk about bad writing with Mech 5 up but i try to make my criticisms as constructive as possible)

fantastic story! i've seen that you've written a sequel so i will be definately reading that!! really fantastic, you've put thought into the characters and plot and it really shows! i love your writing style! fran ~*~

oh dear, thats not good, amazing fight scene! well done!

fab chapter! very exciting and intriguing!

that last bit was very well written, very moving! this is really great!

very good chapter! can't wait to see what he does next!

oh yey! Kiko's back! i like the communication by noises again in this story!

oh maybe he doesn't give me the creeps any more! liking the inclusion of the blades on the arms! liked those before as well!

very good, that guy gives me the creeps though!

wow that was very well written! better not be all dead though!

oh wow wonderful first chapter. great descriptions at the beginning! really enjoyable and intriguing! gonna keep reading! fran ~*~

I like what I've seen. Keep writing. I think that you have a potential writing career in the works.

Great ending, I really liked this story. Hope you write more stories!

Wonderful, Wonderful story! The setting is so original and it just works. That's pretty impressive considering you just successfully merged Ninjas Pirates and Indians all into one story!
My only suggestion would be that you go over in once or twice to pick up those little typos that always seem to pop up.
I'd love to read more about this world you've made, even if it doesn't have Tiega as a protagonist.