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| Ironic Presence 2007-01-11 ch 1, | the reviewing thing is acting all screwy on my end. I tried reviewing your other one 'for Alisha' but it wouldn't work! Gah! Well, for this one, it just seems cool in parts. I like the first stanza-the word choices perfectly convey that emotion. It's almost supernatural, sort of. Second stanza, you mean "are", not "is", line 1. I really like the last line; you're asking to be loved for you, to be noticed for you, and not your sins. Third stanza is pretty cool. It's this part that reminds me of a poem in my collection of poems. But last line: I think you're missing a "be" or something in the sentence. Fourth stanza is pretty cool; I think you're talking about how life is full of different contours, just like the earth isn't flat, and that life is endurable and even wonderful. Fifth stanza, Amen. Last stanza is AWESOME. I loved this one best. It wraps up the entire poem. I always like reading your poetry and getting reviews from you. You know, the other day, I was looking up what a 'maggot' was, but I couldn't find anything definite, at least, not related to music. Do you know where I can find it? Maybe I'm just retarded, at least Google-search-engine-wise, lol. Ok, I'm going to see if it will let me review that other poem now. Presence |