FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Soul Decay 2007-03-13 ch 4,  | abuseWoo, yet another chapter XD great like the last of them and i liked the description of the centaurs quite a bit. and why cant she talk? she still refusing is there a more underlying thing about it? ah well, i supose ill have to wait... |
| Soul Decay 2007-01-19 ch 2, | abuseagain continuing with your past grace in the subject. its going well and i know you did say it moved on quickly in the prologue but i think it would be better if you slowed it down abit, just for the sake of getting into the story. also a bit more description would'nt go a miss. just little things like the trees or the sky or the dorm room. Looking forward to chapter 1. |
| Deprecor 2007-01-18 ch 1, | abuseWow, as stated in your profile, everything is grammatically correct. Most of the detail was nice, but perhaps you'd like to add a physical description for the characters? (Unless you plan to do that later, but I'll just go off of what's posted so far.) Another, really minor problem I found was this sentence. "However, Tony had to idea about the power Esy held within her tiny, fragile body." Was the 'to' supposed to be an 'in'? Other than that, I really enjoyed reading this and am definitely adding it to my Favorites. |
| Soul Decay 2007-01-18 ch 1, | abuseI think its a nice start alouogh maby a bit long winded for a prologue. The theme is good as well id like to see what you can do with it, although i will say dont make Esy to powerfull, she needs to have some limitation somthing to work towards being able to do. I want to know what happens next =) ~Soul Decay |