FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Itamidome 2007-01-29 ch 1,   | It was slightly confusing, but I think I understand what you were trying to say. |
| His Mercy's Waiting 2007-01-25 ch 1, | I liked the dialogue in this. After reading the poem over twice, I was still a little confused as to what it all meant, but I'm naturally slow at figuring out these kinds of things. :) One part that bothered me: "Then I sort of knew/what was inevitable"; the "sort of" sounds kind of awkward in the context. Oh, and I'm happy to say that I'm of no help whatsoever to your trouble with adding breaks in the text. I have the exact same problem, but I've dealt with it for years now, so I've gotten used to it. Good luck with you though. |
| Nnaliseaai 2007-01-24 ch 1, | Its alright but it doesn't capture emotion like people would like it too. |