This sounds very intresting. . .I shall read on! _

This one was a bit confusing, but still good. It's not your best, but not every story can be. That's part of writing. Still, nice plot, nice charies, and nice development of Artemis. She really changed over the course of the story. You might have developed her relationship with her dad more and whatever happened to both her traitorous friends? Although, this is not a novel, so thats not an issue unless you want it to be. Good job.

I love that Noble is dead, and that she is back with Hunter, though I wish that the baby hadn't died. Nice twists.

I love Hunter. He cares for her- he loves her, despite that he has flaws. Noble needs to let her go if he really cares for her.

I liked how you seem to be having Artemis gradually come to her senses about Noble. Hunter is a way better choice.

Very sad. Aphrodite comes off as a mother/sister figure.

Very cute that Artemis and Eillian played a bit of games with him. It makes him a more likable character, though that is not necessary depending on where you are heading with him.

Go Artemis for leaving. He had too much control over her- knowledge/power. She wasn't happy.

Gothic. Romantic. Cynical. A very good start.

Interesting start Very intriguing. And who doesn't love vampires? ) muahaha

I would read more, but alas, I must go to bed *tis 1:30am on a school nite oO yikes!*

Can't wait to read the rest! :D

Hola 'miga. I'm Catfish. I review prologues and first chapters, because prologues and first chapters are supposed to be the most review-worthy part of a story. ;3 Now, let's begin!

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The first paragraph is perfect, save for the sentence fragment right after 'I ran in shame.' It looks fine on paper/screen, but when read aloud, it's just a touch awkward. :3

Second paragraph. I'm not sure 'gracefully' is the word to use in this situation. You can SEE someone walk up gracefully, but you can't hear grace. ;3

HAHAHAHA. Ohman. Love for you. I literally LOL'd at the 'What are you? A pimp?' line. That was pure gold, girlfriend. Lmao.

I like how you bolded those sentences at the beginning and end. Nice effect you got going there. :3 Your writing's generally smooth and your voice is well-developed. G'job.

-Catfish

Wow. Great story D

I don't know - personal opinion, but the part when Noble "died", I think it just happened suddenly - there were no series of events building up to it like a climax.

When you wrote that he died, I was like, "O_O Woah, what?"

LOL. But I LOVED this story! Amazing.

O.O omgsh! That’s terrible! Her best friends abandoned her just like that! Oh come on! Arrg so terrible.

Hunter…he’s…I really don’t know how I feel about him yet… he’s so…I don’t know. Lol it’s just that his personality keeps changing! So does Nobles! Does Noble care about her or doesn’t he? It’s making me confused!

...Vampires can get high? o.O that’s sort of odd…lol

Cool! AphroditeXD and ohh, Artemis as in the Greed goddess! awesomeXD I think Aphrodite is…Artemis’s real mother! She has to be, she was standing with her father and they both have the same eyesXD I’m right, tell me I’m rightXD