...I like it. Great idea and well-worded. Could be rearranged a little to make the plot easier to follow perhaps. Keep it going...

WOW. Creepy and spooky at the same time. thats never happened to me before.

WOW. Youre Irony is great!

almost prophetic. Definitaly beautiful. You drew so many pictures and so many emotions... i dont even know where to start... just wow. No wonder your on my favorites list

your telling the truth about when your fall in a darker and more descriptive ways like its more then just faling...i like it...oh and i'm the worst updater ever...please keep going

i like your use in vocabulary and how you say things like when you get down there you only see what you foresw before you leaped, nothing but cold and fire... i like ur use of words like that xDD

Haunting. I liked how you started it, too; drew me in very quickly. I hope you update this, as it is now it feels like it would make an excellent prolouge, but I'm not sure if it stands quite as well on its own. Feels like there's so much more to the story.

It would be a real shame if this was never continued... I really got into reading this... It doesn't happen that often, but this really interested me... It seems like it could be the start to some epic... It's definitely got the feel of an opening monologue ...Please continue this... (If you really want to co-author it I wouldn't mind being a part of it... I know someone else who would probably be interested as well...)