Okay, I think this would be good if developed. The idea is cool, but there isn't enough in the poem. Also, the line breaks are a little awkward.

Answer for author: forgot

m, well... I think its a good start to something, but it doesn't explain much. I dont get much feeling or emotion out of it. It kinda confussed me. Like I said you got a good start, but it needs some more work.

interesting