PLOT! WOOT

I love caps. I blame you.

I'm so excited to see where this goes. Like, more excited than when Die Hard 4 came out. Now THAT is hard to beat. Yes, be proud.

Yeah, we should get married. We could make LITERARY BABIES!

For the love of all things resembling cookies, update soon!

HOLY HELL!

That was amazing! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get my arse o'er here!

This is such a great chapter. I LOVE the Amoeba metaphor...metaphor? Simile? Eh, whatever.

Evil, EVIL Veronika.

And Horus? What is going on in the world!

This story is definetly coming into its own now. You, my dear, are an amazing writer. I would buy this if it were buyable!

You're... well brilliant really. Very inventive puzzle there, the way all the loose ends of that tie up very nicely for Cyrille. And seriously, Tashi should not be left alone! But he was tons more likable in this chapter again so kudos to you.

And Horus. Wow. Dramatic. Scary. A little confusing but, Wow. Yep, that last bit pretty much sums it up.

-Frost

P.S. Wow.

Oh. The way you reveal the characters secrets is really, really amazing. But I must say, I agree with the people who say there's a lot of references to gay stuff in this story so far. It's not terribly vulgar or anything but I thought I'd point it out. Still, I feel the story is lacking in description of the characters a little bit, which makes it slightly confusing.

A couple of the things that weren't working for me:

Tashi is turning out to be more and unlikable, please, please make him stop downing himself all the time.

Also, even though we know Horus's real name is Gabriel, you have kinda stopped using it. What's up with that?

Otherwise, keep up the great work!

-Frost

HI-HO-MERCY! You have no idea how good this is. I speculate that because if you did know how well you write, you wouldn’t be on fictionpress. You’d be out in the real world, getting movie deals with effing Hayao Miyazaki.

Now the club was awesome. Awesomely imagined, awesomely depicted, and awesomely written. L’awesome, I tell you. And the Dance Amoeba was a good touch. Tehehe at that.

“It sounded like four voices at once, one a whisper, one a shriek, one a growl and the other Horus’ own, tight with rage.”—WHAT? That’s crazy good imagination/writing there. Crazy. (And have I mentioned I love Horus? Not as much as my deep-seeded adoration for Taschi, but quite a bit. He’s like the quiet type you never expect to mutate into an ass-kicking creature, but then when he does, you realize you should have expected it all along.)

And Veronika? I yelled at my computer screen, “Say wha-at?” I figured she’d come back, but I was caught off guard. Now we shall see how Riin/Horus/and other sworn Taschi protectors torment her.

- I LOVE THEE!

ACHABBA!

Well, now that my little heart is broken, I look forward to the upcoming months with some type of hope. Hehe, it's alright though. _

Great chapter. I hope you find time between school and such to update soon. Good luck with grades!

Twilight Starr

The Master of the City sounds spooky. I wonder what will happen. Nice work.

Twilight Starr

That can't be good. Great job!

Twilight Starr

It sounds like a very unusual place live. Original plot. Nice work.

Twilight Starr

Great cast of characters. This chapter was quite amusing. Nice work.

Twilight Starr

It just keep getting worse and worse for him. Poor guy.

Twilight Starr

He sure is an interesting character. Nice work.

Twilight Starr

Interesting story. She seems to be concerned for him. Either that or she's a good actress.

Twilight Starr

That's great. That had to be hilarious to run into her again.

Twilight Starr