this is so beautiful, even with the shame and the tangential touching. i love that those things don't make it hurt.

i'm left with a dry mouth and a sense of wonder.

tremendously gorgeous. vividly gorgeous. all around- gorgeous. I am useless with this kind of poetry- I offer nothing but blind praise.

But your shame suffices my veins.
You are outraged that I would dare use you like this.

remarkable.

i love this. it's exactly what it should be and everything fits perfectly. it's such a delightful fix of feeling, touch, sound. just perfect.

that whole first stanza is great. it's got a alot of innuendo and room to take it as you will, which adds a lot to this as a whole, so good job on that.

third stanza, 'you close your eyes, and i creep behind them' i love that. it's such a gruesome, romantic image.

last two lines of your second stanza could do with a look, ithink. they don't pack as much as the rest of this.

and, my favorite part: 'praying that the
sound of your breathing
can hide the sound of your heart'

how delaightfully sexy of you, darling! i want to marry the first two stanzas - they are orgasmic. so... un-you somehow, you know? in a lovely way.

my name is a tangle
moaned against your hand...

favourites!

Haha enjoyed the last stanza & the mathematical references, o.O... Nice analogy XD...

Err... but I was wondering... why use such a pen name... =/. Esp if you live elsewhere...