Aw!~

that was so cute and pirate likeness.
simply lovely.

keep it up!♥


[ ana ]

Excuse me, ma'am, but you totally used my name.

Because I'm so the sort to make out with boys on the beach at six thirty in the morning.

anyways...
Very cute. I like the English teacher bit. It was clever. I might have to use it sometime. And the metaphor wasn't lame, it was cute. I wouldn't have wanted the story to end there, anyways. Your characters are very real, i.e., "There is a moment when I’m unsure whether he’s actually following me", and other things. You don't overdo the romance, but you make it real and believable, and not too good to be true.

loveloveloveemily

First chapter was great, the characters seem genuinely fixed on each other. I hope her dad isn't as stern and mean as he sounds on the phone. By the way, perhaps I wasn't reading carefully, but what exactly is the narrator's name?

Anyways, I hope to read from you soon.

My only other suggestion would be to give a better story summary so you'll attract more readers. Good luck!