meh, ill finish reading these later, good as always

'Also, it's been statistically proven that the funnier you are, the more you get laid.' Ahaha. :D

That's way cute.

I love this newspaper-y thing. :)

Underpants...oh, my God; he's right.

Yeah, this topic was pretty tough...blegh. Next month's looks quite a bit easier, though...hm, I wonder what I'll do. Maybe I'll change it up, write something that is actually useful!

Who knows?

*giggles* Blast, Felicia, you made me giggle. Why? There are people here...FABulous, though, love.

...I'm having such a gay day. I DID know the difference between wit and sarcasm, but hopefully you've helped some of the ignorant!

Hm, that Absences article seemed to really change topic. Still, it was good; and I think you were pretty close to the formula for wit there, Solemn Coyote (may I call you Solemn? My fingers ask).

^^ Interesting, Six. Especially the last paragraph.

Mobman, your part just all seemed to roll together. I love that! You don't see enough of perfectly complementing pieces, you know.

Yes, it is extremely daunting to write about something when you don't really know what you're talking about. Whenever I try something like that I always think an expert in whatever field I'm tripping across with stumble onto it and correct me ferociously. Hm, maybe I'm just paranoid. Good tips, though.

I love how a good part of these pieces began with, "Oh, **; it's wit. What am I going to do?" Amusing, no?

That bit seemed to go around in a circle. Still, I applaud you for trying, Keba!

Twilight does seem mildly interesting, though I'm not a great fan of vampires. I'll keep it in mind next time I hit Border's, though.

Fantastic dialogue article. Novel, really, as well as informative and entertaining.

>_< Unfortunately, my computer is like...like...well, have you ever seen a drunk baby? The point is, this computer can handle downloading text and that's about it...piece of crap. *growls*

Outstanding job, everyone!

Wolfie

YAY! I love it! .. especially the "so's your face!" and the very postmodernist writing tips at the end. I'll be sure to write something for the next issue.. and I'll submit a description next time. =) =) =)

Good luck with that Windex, Bread. On another note, I'm finally in this! Yay! *is exceedingly happy about that fact*

Aww ... it's true. People are easily amused by funny words. I myself fell victim to an "unmentionables" (refering, of course, to 'knickers' as the story went). Good times ...

Yay Bread! What an awesome way to introduce the newsletter ... I applaud you for your effort!

Yay quote-ness! They're fun and they make me happy.

Ah! *dies* I spy with my little eye the atricle I submitted ... I hope I don't look too stupid. *is embarassed*

Huzzah for knowing nothing! Perhaps one of the truest things EVA. Nicely found, Canilla Stylo, whom I've never seen on these newsletters.

Ha ha ... cockroaches. I can get over the cockroach part because you put in there "Suave, intelligent, loveable, chiselled, scholarly". Makes up for it, in my opinion, Coyote! ... is it even possible to "tri-hexa-quadrupled" something? Yay for writing a lot and writing often! “The Needlessly Drawn-Out Saga of the Skullcrushing War In Bountiful Pony Land,” I would read that one just for its title. Fo'real. Huzzah for existence and cheers to Coyote, once again, for being amazingly inspirational. You know, 'cause now I'm in this article. *grins cheekily*

... why is Canilla Stylo so crazy good at finding quotes? And does the name have something to do with a pen?!

"A review? It must be from some rich benefactor who's discovered my brilliance via FictionPress and wants to give me a ten-billion-dollar grant for my cliche poetry and melodramatic fiction!" Well, huzzah for that! Now that's all I'm ever going to think when I get a review ... thanks. (note the sarcasm) Oh ... I guess I'm easily amused, then. I laughed. ^^ ... do they really get laid from FP? I seriously doubt that. Why would you lie?!

“So’s your face!” You know, anything works there. Your mom, your step-dad, your little pink fish (fo'real insults that I tell X on a daily basis. her step-dad (she doesn't have one, which is why it's funny) is gay with her little pink fish (also doesn't exist). Isn't life great?), pretty much anything along those lines works.

(by the way, there's some sort of formatting issue with this and ... some of the articles got smushed together without boldness or anything!)

Yay going postal! I'm going to one day and then a lot of people will die ... and I will cry. Freak ... toaster accident? What? Aw ... why do you have to insinuate that Bread kills people? That's my base ... oh. Right. EW! Spandex! That's gross! Nice article, by the way. ^^

Ah! Why are there so many Canilla Stylo-Bille (sorry, you're a ball-point pen now, person whom I don't know. only I can't spell right now)

Ha ... Whenever people bring other people back from the dead, I'm going to laugh and mutter "marshmallowmancy" to myself. Yay for geniuses that are believable! Good for you, Coyote. I seem to be saying that a lot. I need to balance. I hate you, Coyote! Ok. Now we're good. ^^

And yay for another quote. I'm done with being happy with them. After four or five they start to get repetative, even if they really aren't.

Aww ... Shane. Some are a LOT better than others. Like the ones you don't say! Oh ... burn. (and now I'm done)

Fen-Shay, ha ha ... McDonald's. ^^

*blinks* Is she even allowed to do that?

Mm. Ok, so that was a really good quote. I heart it.

FEN-SHAY! I LOVE THAT BOOK SO BAD. AND NOW I LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU DID A REVIEW ON IT AND I REALLY HOPE IT ISN'T BASHING IT BECAUSE I, AS AFORE MENTIONED, REALLY LOVE IT. Aww ... you ruin Christmas, Fen. I really did like that book a lot. I haven't read book two because I'm a lazy bum and it's just sitting on desk, under a few other books I'm too much of a lazy bum to read. Yeah. Point being, I did like it and don't mind the excessive teenage hormones because ... it makes life interesting. YOU'RE JUST A SOCIAL OUTCAST, FEN!

Ha ha ... it's true. Smart people don't have common sense. True story. I like to think I'm not proof of that, but ... let's be honest with ourselves, ok?

Huzzah for Coyote and his info-dum conversation piece!

And the last quote. You found a lot of them, Miss Stylo-Billo. Unless you're a man. Then it'd be Mr. Stylo-Billo. But I like the first better, so you're an unmarried woman, ok?

Sometimes I download it. When I feel like it. Which isn't very often. Sorry, Bread ... I'm not visually talented, so sorry again ...

In any case, I think I'll have to pass on the monsters. Unless someone REALLY liked my contrast piece. In which case, I can be convinced to write one on monsters ...

Lovely article, as always. Good work, team!

Felicia.

Hey, guys. Even if delayed, this was very nice. Sorry for the lack of submissions on my part... I'm just not witty. Lol.

Solemn, you've been really helpful! Round of applause to you. XD

Only problem, I think, is that you didn't sort it out as well as you could've, Bread. There were a lot of areas where the topics weren't bolded, etc. You can fix it really easily. If you want, I'll show you where you forgot.

Now, as for those questions... I download every downloadable STP and I love the layout. Dunno of any useable pictures, but I'll see what I can do.

Da Fenster

Brilliant! Stop The Press is simply an amazing read. I learnt alot about wit, and look forward to next month. Monsters, I love writing about monsters lol, so I'm certain I'll enjoy reading next monthes edition.

Also, who can submit an article? Anyone or someone chosen?

Sheri

W00t and h00t. Glad to see this issue made it. I almost had my doubts.

Bread: Once again I'm out-scholared.
Felicia: Nice elaboration on Bread's introduction. I never even though to address the difference between the two.
Canilla: very mysterious. I feel both enlightened and utterly confused.
Multiples of Six: Wise advice. And I'm glad I played some small part in your submission, you benevolent genius.
WyrdWolf: Your entry's sorta melding with Mobman's and Multiples's's's's. Still, it's always good to have an example of wit.
Mobman: Proof that wit can be found in some non-traditional places.
Sakka Fenikkusu: Your facts, while interesting, always make me worry a little bit about this world.
Keba Si Rota: Maybe you didn't write something witty, per se, but you definitely used wit when you wrote your article. It's well thought out.

I look forward to seeing what all of you write for the next issue. Yes, that was a very pointed hint. c'mon. It's about monsters. Everyone knows monsters.