 Midnight In Eden 2007-03-26 . chapter 1Few suggestions, first off since you're writing on a very contemporary topic I'd advise against capitalising the first word of each line as it really only fits with more old fashioned poetry.
Also the bracketed remarks should be part of a sentence with the period after the last bracket.
Otherwise, it's not bad. A very personal piece that expresses itself very directly.
.:midnight:. |