FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| sicklysnowwhite 2007-06-03 ch 1,   | "Power to Summer Lovers!" uh... yeah. ok-ay. Advice that Doesnt Need to be Followed: drop the "Oh no! I'm beginning to cry." near the end. i think you're trying to rhyme in a peom that doesnt have any rhyming and it completly sets off the rhythem of the peom and makes it sound... well, stupid. More Un-needed Advice:"Snowflakes, Snowflakes,/Everywhere. I hate you/Every time I brush you/From my hair." i would change the line arrangement to "snowflakes, snowflakes, everywhere/I hate to/brush you from/my hair" no need to listen to me, these are only my opinions. i thought your poem was ironic and refresingly unique, just like every other snowflake in the world. |
| SerialXLain 2007-04-27 ch 1, | Haha... I love it...and I agree with all my heart. Death to winter...or at least snow! xo |
| WinterDeity 2007-04-23 ch 1, | but...but...snow is fun...and summer is all sunny and hot and you can't do anything about it, but in winter you can layer and layer and you'll be all warm and snuggly...and what about hot chocolate? you can't have hot chocolate in summer...and fire! there's a nice contained fire in your house during the winter and fire is always fun...and what about snowboarding? there's nothing more fun than colliding with a tree at 85 miles per hour an-oh, wait...scratch that...uhm...WINTER IS GOOD! ~the straight-jacket worthy one, Winter~ |
| MRod 2007-03-21 ch 1, | this poem confused me because at first you seem to like winter then you switch to hating it. i didnt care for the ending because it just dropped out of no where and ended. other than that it was good~keep writing~ mrod |
| 97thparis 2007-03-06 ch 1, | This is...different. I can relate very much. |