Wow. That was amazing. Is that all I need to do to write good poetry? Be emo? Lol. Keep up the good work!

I like the dark imagery you convey here, but I think that the overall fluidity of the poem is hindered by the bracketed words. The two 'paranoia' seperated by fourteen lines also needs to be fixed, perhaps by flipping through a thesaurus? (it can be easily remedied, and I am guilty of the same mistake) There are a couple of basic grammatical errors, but overall I do like the rythym of the poem.

Interesting. I like this poem. Don't worry you don't need help. I nbeed more help than you LOL. It doesn't matter if you are suicidal, it's just a phase that I went through too. Although I'm still contemplating it. Oh well. I liked the poem a lot. The use of words were very good. Keep up the good work! (^_^)

DayDreamer64