Reviews for Just Another Cliched Love Story

Reviews For: Just Another Cliched Love Story - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

Minxie 2008-06-17 ch 11,	abuseloved the story. Great Job!
Hazelnut-Romance 2008-04-07 ch 11,	abusesigh happy ending forever more!
s-pecial-lee me 2008-01-10 ch 11,	abuseaww i love this story. cliches are the best! great job.
Jayjack 2007-11-02 ch 11,	abusereally short but of course it is longer than other one shots. and shorter than others. good job.
Jayjack 2007-11-02 ch 9,	abuseyay for frankie. i thought she was just going to walk in AFTER he finished off the phone. but i'm glad she walked in on him.
Jayjack 2007-11-02 ch 2,	abusehmm she is what i want to grow up to be like. ((just with her morals about sex))
asecretamor 2007-04-06 ch 11,	abuseHey! I just finished your story! =) I was too busy reading to review every chapter cause i was excited to know what was going to happen at the end. My only question is how do things progress with her Dad? I mean she says she forgave him, but it still seems like they're not too close. That's also tragic how her mom died. In her dream, is that how the event actually happened? I really liked it overall though, it had some really funny moments, my favorite one was when she shoved his head in the cake and said "Oops" HAHA! then when he got her back and just said "Oops" as well. That was hysterical. Things moved really quickly though, but it was nice in a way becuase i got to get to all the good parts. =) I wanted it to be longer cause i wanted more of it. That's fine though, i'll just have to read your other longer stories. =D Can't wait too! heh, i've made my own story out of this review! Lol! asecretamor
slightlyaddictedx3 2007-03-30 ch 11,	abusei love this story! it reminds me of chemical games! u should check it out...i dont kno the author tho...sorry? XD
dazedandconfused10 2007-03-26 ch 11,	abusei really liked your story
Deafgurl's world 2007-03-26 ch 11,	abuseWow this finished? Wow...I'm gladly that Frankie forgive Will what he done to her. I cant believe he stood up in the assembly & told the students that he love her & hope she give him a chance. Now its happily ever after for Frankie & Will. Hurry update soon.
Allison Smith 2007-03-26 ch 1,	abusealright... the first thing that's concerning me is that you should work on your transitions. In this chapter, they seem to be non-existent. what I mean by this is that she's in the car, then she's home making pasta, then all of a sudden there's this italicized section that might be a dream, might be a flashback... and oh, Okay, it is a dream. then she's in school again. then she's in the car. then suddenly she's home again. you know what I mean? On this note, you should also work more on descriptions. I know sometimes descriptive passages seem repetitive, but they're helpful, and as a reader I'd rather hear more description with a bit of dialogue to move the story along than lots of dialogue and a little bit of description. for instance: what did the car's atmosphere feel like? what does her home look like? what does she look like? how does she really feel inside(without her telling another character, cause that's more dialogue and a little awkward) what does the school look like? what does the school sound like? what does it smell like? ...you get the idea
LiL PiNk 9o 2007-03-25 ch 11,	abuseYeah i do like the ending very good short stories are refreshing after having to wait for forever and a day for udates on other stories i liked this one since it was short and sweet
dooorkette. 2007-03-25 ch 11,	abusevery GOOD ending!! is this the end?! too bad there wasnt any drama...or MORE drama..hehehe
R.F.Y. 2007-03-25 ch 10,	abusewow, will sure fell in love quick... sometimes it feels like the writing is rushing a bit...but i like it Zinf
dooorkette. 2007-03-23 ch 10,	abuseyay!! she should've used some kind of public humiliation. update?

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