Hey I did one of these! It was a continuation of Walter Mitty, and he was a soap opera star. It was pretty bad though, not like this. This is pretty good! XD!

hey dearie.

This piece is really cute -- I like how she keeps drifting off. I still do that...happened to me in French just the other night. Mme. keeps telling me I have really weird expressions on my face. LOL.
Anyway, I think the ellipses are fine. They show the transition between the Sara's daydreams and the real word more smoothly than if you had used, say, asterisks. Without them, the story would be too abrupt.
I was thinking about you on the way home, and I've decided you also need to watch "My Destiny," which has an **amazing** music video (the last thirty seconds or so are in English), and (if you have time) "Dangerous Love," which is this Banjun drama they did that is hilarious...it's actually the first thing I saw.
I'm not obsessed. Really.
ttyl

luv always

Guillemot

Too many have you used the ellipsis. They're not necessary in some places. Other than that, it's finely written, the description in particular.