Reviews for Forever - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Forever

Twilight Starr 2007-11-08 ch 1,	It's sad when you realize you're growing up and you don't get to be a child anymore. Good start. ~Twilight Starr~
Jas Evans 2007-08-24 ch 1,	Hey! This was my favorite from the three I've read. Yes I can play favorites :P I'm a sophmore right now so I guess I can't really relate completely to this piece, but it does make you hope that somewhere there's a school out there who's class is that close and would do that kind of stuff for each other. The whole thing was really.. I guess you could just say bittersweet? in lack of a better word cauz I'm too lazy to think :P I really like the train track opening for this, it set the mood really well and just the idea to use that was nice, it gave you a scene picture and the mindframe of the story good job :)
LeilaX 2007-05-21 ch 1,	Interesting story. I take it you didn't plan on it being a one-shot judging by your note at the end. I think this is a good start to the story. I liked how you reflected back on different events from the past to address the nostalgia the protagonist is feeling. You use the comma too often and sometimes in the wrong places. You need to be careful with your typing e.g. waitin, gettin, cant, goin etc. Something like this detracts from the impact of your story but is easily remedied. I liked the pace of your story up until the end at which point I felt the ending was abrupt. It seemed like you left a lot unsaid . I think this was a good chapter, I was able to see things from the protagonist's point of view and understand what she was feeling. That said, you need to concentrate on embellishing on what you've got, as I said earlier the ending just seemed abrupt. Perhaps this is a project you plan to continue, in that case I'd advise you to to have your plot written out before going any further.
rainluff 2007-05-10 ch 1,	Hmm.. I loved how you briefly and (kind of) randomly told the "stories" of the people in the class, how they got into trouble, how they spent their senior year, how some of them left your town and how some would be staying. In most stories (well, in most of the fics I've read xP), the authors would go on and on with the descriptions of the characters, sometimes, to the point that readers would be bored. But in this... well, wow:)) I loved how you were straight out in writing, not even bothering with boring character introductions. And for me, that's kinda cool. This really got me hooked. I'll be waiting for the next chapter^^. You, go girl:) Oh, and your English skills are not horrible, dear^^. - Hannah^^. (reviewers_found)

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