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| Malissa Michelle White 2007-11-30 ch 1, | abuseWait a minute...you obviously live in LA. Otherwise there'd be no way in Hell you'd be able to know about Eagle Rock in the 90s. I'm guessing you're still in high school by now. Gangster Valedictorians? Interesting concept, but the writing is a little shaky. Needs slightly more comedy, and a little less stiff resolution toward destruction-it makes it obvious, and therefore, far less believable. But i'll give it a shot. |
| pinkfluffyoranges 2007-11-07 ch 8, | abuseThis story was simply put AMAZING. It seems you hit the nail on the head in every possible way when writing a story. The only thing troubling me is why Duran didn't notice or question the bruises when they were having sex? But other than that, thanks for giving me something so impossibly good to read |