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| 123454321 2008-03-08 ch 1, | abuseI like the sarcastic voice used in this piece. It is layed on its thickest on the last line, which would be cliche if not for your excellent use of it. The second half of the first stanza seems somewhat forced. I had to reread it a few times before I could really go on. -J.A. Courtesy of the review marathon (link on profile). |
| lockna2 2007-03-29 ch 1, | abusethis is really cool i like it a lot |
| Tytherpol 2007-03-29 ch 1, | abuseWhoah I didn't see this as being about gossip at all, but I guess I probably should have. How lame of me. But sweet poem. |
| kelloggs256 2007-03-28 ch 1, | abuseI loved this up until the end..."Once again, I sigh and shake my head/ As if you know what you're talking about." If you were going to take your peom in a dialouge direction how about indicating that from the beginning...maybe with quotations...a conversation between two people...just a thought...but good otherwise |
| a silenced revolution 2007-03-28 ch 1, | abuseWell done. Everyone does have secrets I believe. Keep writing! |
| stalkerlesson101 2007-03-28 ch 1, | abusevery intriguing, i liked it altough it was a bit repatative. it gives a feeling of loss of hope. good job ~rach |
| Simfreak111 2007-03-28 ch 1, | abuseit is too bad that we live in a society that thrives off of gossip and scandal. what we really need is the truth. |
| tuieri 2007-03-27 ch 1, | abusehah. yes. |
| unspecified 2007-03-27 ch 1, | abuseit's really good so far!! i like it!! it's really kewl. keep writing!! you have a lot of talent! |
| Neteri Bennu 2007-03-27 ch 1, | abuseNice. |
| Summerdazed 2007-03-26 ch 1, | abusei'm not sure i understand this piece, but your choice of words seem to suit the whole flow. review me if you're free :O) =summerdazed= |
| Evil Spawn 2007-03-26 ch 1, | abuseNo doubt an excellent poem. This world needs a hero instead of those people that pretend to know what's going on. |
| Not Quite Dry Eyed 2007-03-26 ch 1, | abuseI like it a lot. "Once again, I sigh and shake my head As if you know what you’re talking about" That line reminds me of people in my life, how they think they know so they tell people, but really they are just stupid people who should keep their mouths shut. Anyway, that was my rant for the day. Everyone does have their secrets and I think some things should stay that way, secret. Great poem. Keep writing forever and always. Please R&R me sometime. Not Quite Dry Eyed |
| Toxic.Industrial.Waste 2007-03-26 ch 1, | abuseI read your "rather long note" & you seem a bit rusty, but not horribly. I enjoyed this one much more then Mannequin. I really had nothing to say on that one, though. Nothing to correct, just not my favorite. I really adored this one, though. Good job. Try to keep writing. Even if it's only in a journal. Maybe it'll inspire you. ♥ Erica Sky |
| in theory 2007-03-26 ch 1, | abuseThe title of this is cool (I'll admit, my title-fetish is the reason I noticed it first); different without being too obscure. The second stanza had a grammar wobble that confused me a bit, not sure if it's wrong or if I'm tired or if I just misread it but thought it worth mentioning. And yeah, I agree with you on the subject; people are the devious, confusing sort. But interesting. Nice job. Jack |