Reviews for Nightfall - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Nightfall

Morte d'Amour 2007-10-24 ch 1,	Ah, I like this very much! Very impressive indeed. My absolute favorite line is "While crows peck your wrists until water is bled." Beautiful! You have a wonderful way with words. The flow is exceptional, and even the rhyming is nicely done! You have great potential as a writer, so never doubt that you won't ever get published. You have a very unique mind, so just keep doing what you love and see where the road takes you. :)
Ladybugg13 2007-10-06 ch 1,	that was stunning. "Blacken the floors and burn the newspapers." that is my favorite line. It really stand out to me. oh god. if i write something else I might have to stalk you... but I think i just like it, three is enough for one night. the line, "Ponder the papers and pills by your bed", is about suicide to me, is that what you meant by it? I didn't actually get that until the second time I read it, and I wonder if thats just my own projections. -Bugg
headingnowhere 2007-10-04 ch 1,	And you tell me to go crazy ::points to 4 lines per:: Anyway, it's really good. I love the first two paragraphs, not quite sure why, but I do. Anyway, this isn't really a decent comment, but I didn't really like the "hot and cold" bit. I don't know, it's just that after you used such illiteration, I thought that better adjectives could be chosen. Anyway, over all I really liked it=)
Ethearia 2007-06-05 ch 1,	Love love LOVE the rhythm! Once again, extremely original! It's not very often that you come by a well written aabb rhyming schemed poem. I think it would make an awesome song! Sounds a bit like rap but the good kind. [slow tasteful rap?m] It has a dark edgy feel to it that in contradiction to the title, sort of wakes you up and gets the blood flowing.
Gemma Lovell 2007-05-07 ch 1,	I really like your references to Cinderella and Snow White, you put it in an interesting perspective. Your rhyme is not bad either, especially for your first try. And (if it makes you feel any better) my English teacher is a nun and smushes any amount of creativity I have in the writing department. I know how you feel. Good job! Gemma
deadrosepetals 2007-04-24 ch 1,	I could relate to that...anyway I loved it.
Ironic Presence 2007-04-16 ch 1,	Wow. Again, awesome. Why did your teacher laugh at you when you said you wanted to be a writer?!?! Heck, my teacher commends me to be a writer, and you've already surpassed most of what I've ever written in skill. Oh, well sigh--I'll still write, anyway! triumphant pose Rather dark. I don't know if the rating should be K, but then it's not my call. I like the colors-blank, red, grey, black, white. Colors I normally associate with. Twenty/empty, eh... approximate rhyme, but I didn't notice it when I read it. The rhythm was consistent, or so it seemed, and it was just excellent. Now excuse me as I add you to my favorite authors' list... Your humbled reviewer, Sarcastic Presence
evasprecher 2007-04-10 ch 1,	i like it! but maybe try not rhyming... as i have already said !
Stella-Polaris 2007-04-06 ch 1,	Wow... Just wow...
Ink'd-Reality 2007-04-04 ch 1,	Not too bad for your first try at rhyming, though it was a little dodgy in areas, as with the rhythm. Once again, a dull introduction. I want to read the first line and be dumbstruck. I want a SENSE of the poem. Make me want to read more. I thought the ending could have been more effective, too. And, yet again, you have far too many themes in here. There’s the whole media thing, then theres the fairytales, then the relationship… You need to pick one, and accentuate it more. The language itself was lacking a little. I’d like to be made to think more rather than simply being told the facts. All in all, I think you’ve done better. This one could use some work.
London Blaise 2007-04-03 ch 1,	This poem has an intense, driving rhyme scheme (MCR influence, no?) that I find quite appealing. You rhyme well, too, and I like that. I see two major themes in this poem - one, a political/social message, and two, a menacingly whimsical fairy tale. Personally, I think these two ideas would be better as seperate poems; they seem to clash somewhat. However, I believe you know your meter; that in itself is something to be praised for. On a personal note: keep working with poetry, and always experiment. Best of luck!
love like rockets 2007-04-02 ch 1,	Ooh. I liked this. Modern, and yet medevial at the same time. It's a really pretty mix of both pretty fairytale and ugly realism, and the rhyme scheme doesn't sound annoying or anything. Loved the reference to pondering the pills by the bed. This society is so amazingly drugged that it's ridiculous. :( Good job, darling! I do hope to see more from you~♥!
Fire Guardian 2007-04-02 ch 1,	Hey, this is good! Although I've never experienced a major loss, I really understood how it would feel for some people by reading this. Good work!
helena 2007-04-02 ch 1,	well i must say this is impressive.

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