I love this, it's a perfect loaded piece of dirty Americana - your writing style is brilliant.

Wow wow the characterisation is amazing. I love how you've managed to put such detail into a monologue. The narrator portrays herself as some trashy girl, and yet us readers are able to see her innermost wistfulness and girlish yearning for love... And the ending, "Maybe at the end of it all we’d be laying in the middle of the road, outlined in chalk," wow.

Very very impactful, it's excellent writing.

Few errors:
"80’s coverlets starring at stucco ceilings" [staring]
"we’d be laying in the middle" [lying]

At any rate, good job, keep writing!

Right on. I really like what you've written here. I'm going to read more of your stuff.