FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| anonymous 2008-08-07 ch 2, anon. | abuseuh kinda weird i gues though maybe explain certain words in your story though still love your jargon |
| Miraje-nocturne 2008-06-01 ch 5, anon. | abuseThis was great^^ I loved how you explain Zazar's feelings and mental condition. And really interesting plot too. I'm intrigued by Avare's name, how did you choose it? I'll go read the bonus chapter, it sound promising XD |
| Xx-Blue-Eyed-Fey-xX 2008-04-06 ch 5,  | abusewow, that was...kinda depressing acually, but at the same time it was good. i liked it in this rly strange way. it was depressing and sumwat twisted, still i couldn't stop reading. very captivating. btw, thanx for putting in the goldfish note, i wouldn't have understood that part w/o it. good story |
| Liviania 2007-11-19 ch 5, | abuseI'm not sure why I found some parts confusing - I might've simply read too fast. I think it's because of your quiet, almost abstract style. I've been reading a great deal of hyper-detailed prose recently. Your English is actually quite good. Until you asked about translating more stories at the end of the epilogue I didn't realize it wasn't your first language. Livi |
| Liviania 2007-11-19 ch 6, | abuseThis was a very good story, although somewhat confusing at some points. The premise certainly is intriuging. Livi |
| Aeshtarai 2007-07-08 ch 6, | abuseI love this story. Thanks for not writing a happy ending! |
| Sysi 2007-05-08 ch 1, | abuseDefinitely do translate more of your stories! This is one of the best stories on Fictionpress I have bumped into. It's refreshingly original and you keep up well the atmosphere. It doesn't seem fake at all, quite the contrary: it's a well-written story that evokes strong feelings. And points for not writing a happy ending. I was afraid half of the story that the devam would take pity on Zarar and spare him so he and Avare could live happily ever after. (Please note that I'm not an angsty teenager who revels in unhappiness and hates the ever after endings, it's just that this story for some reason seemed like the traditional happy ending would destroy it.) To sum up, you are a skilled writer, whose stories I would like to read more (just maybe next time post the chapters, despite how short they are, as seperate chapters - it would make the story less heavy to read) and I especially liked the ending and the fact that you don't let the age-old traditions and clichés of writing restrain your storytelling. |