Pretty good, although again I have a few quibbles with it. A description of clothing would be nice, maybe tell us what period of time this is from. Also, dashes are double hyphens, not triple, and don't accompany periods. You seem to have fixed that in your other story. An ellipsis has spaces between the periods. Also, you might want to consider more common names. I have no idea how to pronounce Sthomas.

Again, it felt a little rushed, and it was very short. Length comes with becoming familiar with writing, but try making a chapter a little longer. A good rule of thumb is that at least 3500 words is a good length.

Regards,

JJ

PS: I'll probably finish reading and reviewing your stuff over the period of the next week.

Aww. More is coming, I presume? This is sweet, and from what I've seen of Kent so far, I like him. Especially 'cause he's a gimp. ^^

You could do away with some of the tripple dashes, though, but those are stylistic choices and not inherently incorrect.

Anywyas, here are some lines I really like;

"The baby made her moody and sick most of the time." I don't know if it was intentional, but this just feels so eleven. Like a direct accusation twoards 'the baby.' :]

“Why, Mama? Papa’s not sick, he can get it,” muttered Kent, fidgeting with the pencil in his hands. He was racking his brain for a sentence to finish up his school assignment, write about “Your Favorite Place.” Haha, we all remember those. It just helped with the age authenticity, which is something I really struggle with. (I always end up with super-precocious little kids. xD)

But, you kind of repeated here:

people you’d never expect to be interconnected somehow. But they were. = They were connected.

And this phrase seemed a bit awkard; the always-traffic road.

And; "“Fine,” shrugged Kent, getting up half-reluctantly but half-quickly also." It just doesn't feel very real to be half reluctant, and the other half quickly. Maybe he felt reluctand, but his body reacted quickly out of sheer habit? Or something.

Sorry, I'm not very good at concrit, but I tried. ^^

This is very interesting. Living in COLD Vermont, it gave me a laugh too. Does it end here or will there be more? Great job, I really enjoyed it.