I loved it! write on! :)

hmm, I feel like critiquing a bit, if you don't mind. I think this is a very good base for a poem, but your next steps might be experimenting with different words. Poetry is basically wordplay and experimentation, and sneaking in as much sub-text as you can (or is needed) into a stanza, or whatever the case it. Try metaphors, and expand your vocabulary. It's a good start though =)