Lexington, I'll edit if you'll send me the chapters.
And... FAINT PINK HUE LIKE A SETTING SUN?!?!?!
BAH!
CHRISTOPH!
And who is Jerethor? Because if he is who I THINK he is, I'm gonna kill both you and Cindraay.
You will die a horrible horrible death. With drowning. And suffocating. And lightning-struck-ed-ness-ing.
..Yes.

Nice! Enjoying this a lot.
Suggestion, though: the transition to Cindraay should be more difinitive... some sort of divider, or horizontal bar...

Also, I can figure out who most of the main characters are (who yer basing them on), but, who's Jerethor?

Heya! Finally started reading this, lol. Sorry. I haven't been on FictionPress for any great length of time for quite a while.
Anywho, nice first chapter. Definately interested to see where you go with the story. The only thing I noticed is the sentence structure and grammar needs some work. There were a number of places that read kind of odd.
Anyway, I gotta go... I'll keep reading.
~DragnBreth