FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| shy green rock 2008-04-10 ch 1,  | abusehaha I wished it had been a bit longer, but it was cute. |
| Jayjack 2007-11-03 ch 1, | abuseawe how cute. very short but cute. |
| akeyana 2007-09-17 ch 1, | abuseIt's sweet. I wish I could say something more eloquent, but my brain isn't really functioning now. And I like that the brother isn't full overprotective; it makes this different. Just one thing of note; speech should be: "Like this," she said. "Not this." She said. ^^ But really, that's basically the only thing in here I've picked out, and I'm completely obsessed with grammar, so ^^. x.akeyana |
| bekahlu 2007-05-15 ch 1, | abuseThat is a pretty good story so far! The only thing is that some of the "scenes" moved a little to fast, but other than that, its a good start! |
| Murphy's Lawyer 2007-05-14 ch 1, | abuseI liked it. You gave it a good twist, a nice quirk considering so many one-shots on here are pretty angsty. (I would know... I'm self-proclaimed Queen of angsty one-shots!) - LL Okay, now off to read the next chapter in Hemp Bracelet. ^_^ |