Reviews for The Fate of A Monster

Jesse the Storyteller
2008-08-16
ch 1,

abuse"Their mission is the beasts defeat" and "monsters fears" ... both of these need 's on the ends. beast's and monster's.

I like how you make the reader sympathetic to the dragon, such as how the dragon doesn't hurt them until they hurt him first, and how the dragon cries - I think it would have been better if you brought that aspect out a lot more.

Also when you said "Believing their mission as God's will"... I think it would have been better to say was instead of as, but anyway... if you had brought that idea back up again in the last stanza it would have hit closer to the reader's heart.

Good poem - good rhyming and rhythm. It flows very nicely and your images are simple and clear. I wish it had more emotional value though. :)

-Jesse
Attack of the review marathon! (link in my profile)

Naramyon
2008-04-05
ch 1,

abuseA beautifully sad poem.
And truly, you are right. Who is the monster in the end?

~Zoa

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