FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Justin A Caynon 2008-04-08 ch 1,  | abuseVery short compared to you're normal stuff. And do I sense some kind of pentameter here? Or is that just my imagination. Anyway its great. I like it, like I love all your stuff. |
| soliloquium 2008-01-17 ch 1, | abusegod. i cried when i read this one. it's just-- it's honestly funny how good writers can take something that happens to everyone, that everyone feels like, and turn it something unmistakeably GORGEOUS. you are talented. unc.onditional |
| simpleplan13 2007-11-02 ch 1, | abuseI love how you start it with not being drunk and then go into the description of basically getting drunk off of someone.. I also like the ending and how you state that they knew too... thats an interesting piece of info |
| Chandra-Moon 2007-10-30 ch 1, | abuseI love this idea, getting drunk off someone, because I know exactly the feeling. "An alteration of sex- condescening/and transcending." I like how you are getting drunk off him, yet you describe him as drinking you (through his "sugary mouth"...very nice). I don't understand Alteration of Sex yet, though. Is he using you, using your inclination to get drunk off of him to condescend and transcend? All the while, "you felt it, you knew." He was fully aware of what he was doing. Some many questions raised. Intriguing. |
| Definition 2007-09-03 ch 1, | abuseLovely...this is so beautiful. Heh, i don't think you'll ever cease to amaze me :p |
| the naked civil servant 2007-08-17 ch 1, | abusegorgeous beyond gorgeous. there's something about that phrase : "pulled through an alteration of sex" that just sparks off so many connotations, it's amazing.. and the last line. pathos, pleading, resignation, certainty. i love i weep i worship :P |
| Faileas 2007-08-15 ch 1, | abuseI so know what you're talking about this piece. It brings back many memories of failed love. Great piece! |
| Aquafied 2007-08-05 ch 1, | abuseit is short but it accomplishes something interestingly beautiful |
| Emo-tional Princess 2007-07-16 ch 1, | abuseI really like this one. One of my favs. Good work. xx |
| wordsworth in a garbage can 2007-07-14 ch 1, | abuseoh, gorgeous! the way sex should be. |
| no.peace.los.angeles 2007-06-30 ch 1, | abuseOh, wow, that is powerful. So gorgeously worded. Really perfect. Amazing. Keep writing! :) |
| Moondog Dozier 2007-06-29 ch 1, | abuseThis is specific, and to the point. It captures a universal theme that all can relate to, but can not put into words this concretely. Very well written. MD:77. |
| vampiric-happenings 2007-06-20 ch 1, | abusethis is wonderful. desciptive. i like it. |
| Tr APeze-sWiNGer 2007-05-30 ch 1, | abusewow. I can relate. I love the description of a "sugary mouth" and the way it ends "you felt it, you knew" almost forboding and incomplete. Very nice |
| she smolders 2007-05-25 ch 1, | abuseThere's something about the last line that makes me hear it whispered in my mind when I read it to myself. It's very powerful and leaves me feeling a little sad and hopeful at the same time. Take care. |