It's so deep, my nose is already bleeding.

Nah. I loved it.:)

this is just scary.

jeez. my eyes refuse to close their so wide right now.

the first chapter was freaky, but i love the second part.

this is so bitter-sweet

you really have a knack for writing, i could almost see this angel chained to a lonely, desolate rock

yet seeing everything he loved and wanted destroying their world just beyond his reach

never stop writing
(>^) Eleri (^

Yay!! More description! Not exacly perfect, but better. But again I ask myself, "Where is this taking place?!" Trust me, lack of setting the scene is a bad thing that shouldn't be dabbled in. Like I said before: Just because you don't want to reveal the situation or plot doesn't mean you can't reveal your characters. But the cliffhanger was good! Can't wait to read more!

Wow. I was a little lost at the beginning (probably because that was intentional), but the story was intriguing. The little information given was a big cliffhanger, but you could've use a little more description in your scenery. Just because you don't want to reveal the situation, doesn't mean that you can't describe the characers or setting.

Holy cow.
This is awesome.
I love your language, description, diction, emotion, everything. It's so reminiscent of those old myths. AWESOMEPOSSUM.

I think you should write a third chapter. (:

This is different :D

he says "he's not your god, claro."
it could make sense, but i feel like you were going for "cara" more. idk, it just doesn't sound right in my mind for him to say "claro" and not "cara"...unless you were going for clearly/obviously? ha, sorry if this doesn't really make sense...

Wow, that was just beautiful. It was truly inspiring and I hope I become as great a writer as you one day ^_^

I love the imagery in this piece. Haunting, beautiful and evocative all at once. Very well done!

Well done! You're awesome!

I promise to read more of yours! You're a great author.

Good luck with your work. You won't be needing it, though.

That was really, really good. I don't know quite how to describe it, but I really liked it. You did an awesome job :)

What do you mean 'wholly her fault'?

wow, that's gorgeous imagery!

*shivers slightly* i love kendal. and you.