Wow! I really love all the analogies and symbolism that you use. I know I said this before, but you are a talented writer!

not pure plain emptiness. hah. i see where you were coming from when you said it doesn't mean anything anymore, but some people actually do get something from me. like me, of course. it doesn't exactly pertain to me now, but i can totally relate to it. well written!

I like this, it seems to have a nice slow tone.

It was good, but unless this is to be sung as either really slowly or as an interlude, it needs to be longer.

Benjamin Snow of Halo Strip.
(pseudonym.)