 Isca 2009-01-10 . chapter 1"I know that I am filthy." I like this allusion to Judas' betrayal of Jesus. |
 not sure yet 2007-10-16 . chapter 1much more interesting once you know the backstory stuff in the authors note, i like the third line |
 simpleplan13 2007-09-03 . chapter 1Im sure youve already given it to her since Im reviewing late.. lol, but I like it... the filthy line is great and I think its ok to change the name of the town.. it still works well |
 thestonedfox 2007-09-01 . chapter 1My religion tells me to be insulted. Everything else tells me that this is beautiful. Law of averages, you win.
I loved this. |
 SayIt'sWrong 2007-08-27 . chapter 1Wow...I actually have no idea what to say, which is quite unbelievable if you know me. I really liked this, a lot. The last two lines just contain so much beauty, I just can't explain how or why.
Beautiful, poignant and genius as always.
[QV] |
 synapse collapse 2007-08-16 . chapter 1Oh oh oh how could I have missed this? This is absolutely gorgeous, and the idea is so interesting. I've never read anything like this before, and I really really like this. The repetition fits in nicely, exposes what she's really thinking before you cover it up again. Guh I love you and your writing. |
 Holly Rose E 2007-08-15 . chapter 1... those first three lines make me physically ache. the repetition of "filthy" cries out more desperately every time it is said, and then the abrupt stop... like a sudden realization, like they've been slapped in the face and they know they have to admit why - just fucking WHY - they feel like it...
painful. so much pain in this work and i love it. absolutely adore it.
you're gorgie. |
 wordsworth in a garbage can 2007-07-11 . chapter 1interesting idea! the way you wrote out the third line- I think- added an emotional kick to it. and then the last two I could just hear being in a grizzled whisper. excellent as always. |
 no.peace.los.angeles 2007-06-24 . chapter 1Oh, this is incredible. Religion is such a hard topic to pull off, and you did it brilliantly. It puts this whole new spin on things, and wow, I'm impresed. Really wonderful work here. I especially love that you cut off in the middle of "filthyfilthyfil--" like the narrator (Jesus?) realized he (she?) was just lying to him/herself, and was like, "Yeah, I'm gonna cut the crap." Really great. Love it. Keep writing! :) |
 multiples of six 2007-06-23 . chapter 1Haha, the part in the Bible about Judas kissing Jesus always seems to have homoerotic undertones.. at least for me. =D
Until I read the note I thought this was about Joseph and someone, because it's in Bethlehem.. but Jesus/Judas is more interesting!
I like it. =) |
 kaylajac 2007-06-23 . chapter 1bible slash?
that's the part where my jaw hits the floor and breaks and i am in love with YOU, girlie. |
 AchtungBabyAchtung 2007-06-22 . chapter 1i love it. Not really into religious poetry much, because it tends to be a bit self righteous and pompous, but i really like this, XD
iz x |
 Faithless Juliet 2007-06-21 . chapter 1This is short and sweet, it has a kind of modern narration to it in the beginning, through to the filthy part. Then the ending becomes softer and more biblical. Sweeter almost. I enjoyed the idea to. Keep up the good work.
Much love,
Juliet. |
 Suicidal Skies 2007-06-19 . chapter 1Five little lines and you've conveyed so much. Very well written.
-SKies |
 Crowerd Robinson 2007-06-14 . chapter 1Very beautiful. Short and yet so fulfilling ... in five lines you've created love and helplessness, pleasure and turmoil. It would make the fishes shiver. |