 Jesse the Storyteller 2008-04-19 . chapter 1Wow. Very interesting mechanism you used there with the shape of the poem. I don't quite understand the meaning of the poem, but I really enjoy the phrases that you create. "Hearts widowed by time," I especially liked. I think that the closing lines are especially powerful. Very interesting poem. :)
-Jesse
Beware the review marathon! (Link in my profile) |
 Esther Jade 2008-04-19 . chapter 1This is a very visually interesting poem. I don't quite how you managed that but it's very effective.
Partly because of its shape, though, I find the words lose a bit of their impact. Its harder to trace the line of thought. And the line of thought seems very abstract.
- Esther, currently reviewing for the Review Game's Review Marathon (link in my profile) |
 .following.black.doves. 2007-06-16 . chapter 1I take back wat I said about ur best poem before, I think THIS is your best poem! hehehe, it has a little drop.
I would tell you what my favourite lines were, but they were all my favourite lines! I wish I could write like you...:'( |
 Professional Dreamer 2007-06-16 . chapter 1I like it, especially the shape. Couldn't quite string it together in my mind to say what makes it so appealing. It just is. |
 my poetic lie sense 2007-06-12 . chapter 1awesome shaping!that must of took a while :)
however, i must ask why you capitalised every new line even if it was in the middle of a sentence
or perhaps you wanted it to break off into a new sentence?
:P good job anyways! keep it up |