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Reviews For: Soothe the Mind

Taltush/MeiMei
2007-06-13
ch 1,
abuseThis is kind of cute and sweet, but I'd adjust the format. The new lines every two seconds makes the flow a bit choppier and more uncomfortable. I'd just combine some of the lines to make the story keep flowing at a smoother pace. All in all, though, a very nice little piece.
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