Very very nice. I think the first stanza is the best, but the third is close runner-up. My only problem is that the last line doesn't fit in with the rhythm of the rest. Is there any way you could make it do so? I don't want to tell you anything too specific, because I'm wary of writing the poem for you. Just think about it a bit.

Oh, and kudos on pulling off the rhyming thing. Not many writers can do that.

Great, touching, wonderfull

Wow, this is nice. The rhythm and rhyme work really well. Being an American, I don't know about Gallipoli, so you might want to elaborate on that in your author's note, or something, but this works for just about any tragedy in general, so hey :~)

I don't know about Gallipoli, but this poem puts me into a somber mood, sad. Good job! Most people don't like to remember wars but I think an effort is due in order to create the will to maintain peace.

Very Good and touching

Awww.. this poem makes me really proud to be a kiwi. Beautifully written, absolutely lovely.

that was beautiful, and it was really moving, but i don't know the history behind it so i probably didn't get the full effect. it was beautful though.

I like this. You from round here? (Here being New Zealand) Well written. What's happening with the Sirius/Remus fic?

That is a *really* great poem!

Woh...I was wondering if your stories were as good as your columns (wonderful series...I can't wait for the next issue)...and they are...Wowa. This is filled with emotions and...I am jealous.

Very good. I liked it. I'm familiar with the history of Gallipoli.

Exceptional; a beautiful to call to people to remember something that shouldn't be forgotten. This is a wonderful and powerful work. Keep up the great job.

That was beautiful. That's the only way to describe it. Happy ANZAC Day, I know it's either this week or the next, hang on, I'm just checking my diary... *ten minutes later* ..... Ah YEs! It's on Wednesday! Happy ANZAC Day for then.... I'll read it again then.... Thanks for writing it, Cairnsy. Love it.

oh my! i saw galipali the movie in my history class...how touching...

Being a kiwi I've often thought about this, but you've really put into words what most of us can't. An excellent piece of work. A tragedy is always a hard thing to write well, but you have achieved it without letting any words getting in the way. Your message came across loud and clear. Its work like this that help us remember. We will never forget them.