This is so unique!

Oh, nice ending line! I think it really ties things up nicely. You're right, the word insane is tossed around a whole lot. In life I have no problem with it, but I do when it comes to fiction, because fiction is supposed to NOT tell lies about your character. Safe to say YOUR characters were most definitely insane :P If they're not, I don't know who would be.

It's been a fun ride! A small thing I have generally been annoyed by:
Your author note just sort of comes in so quickly. Please use some sort of divider between the actual chapter and the AN. They're so intimate. I get all shocked when I realize its the end, because the AN shows up.

Otherwise, I hope your newfound mental illness isn't all too destrctive or malevolent. Good luck to you!

- Frac, from the Review marathon (link on profile)

"She shoots again, and the woman in the posh, designer dress, the one who walks around the precinct with her nose in the air, looking at everyone who isn’t as well off as her as though they are dirt on her shoes and the homeless man who came into the shop to get out of the rain both fall to the ground, hit by the same bullet."

That is one hell of a long and complicated and hard to read sentence! :O Divide, please.

Your longer descriptions were generally TOO long and I ended up mentally nodding off if they went on for too long. So, aka: Not good.

Second example of sentence that needs some re-modeling:
"She crouched, brought her head down close to the ground and listened to the guttural little hisses fire makes as it fights the water and loses, it’s once flamboyantly, sultry, brilliantly harsh intensity giving way to long grey wisps of smoke, fading and rising in mute tribute to a flame that had once burnt bright."

A WHOLE lot of "and"'s in there too. Might want to cut them down. They reduce the emotional impact if you start a sentence with it (usually).

Other than that, I was compelled by the story as per usual. The schizophrenic lady is still my favorite though (both personalities), but this one is pretty darn crazy too!

It never does end well for your psychoes does it? Even this one suffers. Ack. I'll scream in her ear so she'll lose the silence :) I find it a nice twist that you make their worst fears come true, in a sense. Gary lost and this gal now lives in silence. Oh, the poetic justice!

- Frac from the Review Marathon (link on profile)

You switch POV quite franatically in this piece. Like, take this:
"If you wanted to help me, you would let me go back home. Or you’d give me protection. A house on an island, maybe, far away from anyone, where no one could get to you"
me, me, you you. Yet it is all the same paragraph, the same italics. So it should be the same narrator too.

I think you quite catch the mentality of a paranoid man. *THINK* that is, since I am not one. He is very insane-sounding too. I particularly loved the ending. It was so bitter and regretful. Poor Gary ;_; He wanted to live.

Though, "lucky" for him, they probably did not plan for this to happen, so yay! He did not really lose to them! He just gives them too much credit :3

- Frac, coming at ya from the Review Marathon (link in profile)

it's the end of the ride? no! well for the beautiful journey that it was been it really was so god I really loved the epilogue(some really good lines)but it's all over! wah xcuse while I go and blow my nose

Aw, my last review for your story! *cries* Its been great, but no I get to read your other works, woo! But yeah, this story Rocked The Arts! lol

Oh, and what were you diagnosed with? Just wondering... hope you're doing okay! bye!

I love it! Heck, I always love the your chapters!Such a contentious girl, a lover of water AND fire. Interesting. Too bad the story is ending =( I look forward to the epilogue! woohoo! Enjoy your holidays!

Fantastic chapter. Please update soon.

~Twilight Starr~

Nice addition. Keep it up.

~Twilight Starr~

Ah, a killer/pyro. It seems we have an interesting array of characters. Great job!

~Twilight Starr~

Awesome chapter. You're doing a good job--especially on describing feelings.

~Twilight Starr~

Beautifully written chapter. Nice work.

~Twilight Starr~

Nice addition. All Jack's "friends" were amusing. Great job!

~Twilight Starr~

Good story. Nice start. Your plot looks good from what I can see. Good luck with writing, this story, and life. Have a wonderful day.

~Twilight Starr~

This chapter was awesome. And funny, in the irony especially. I love how you ended it. Brilliant. A loose brick? o_0 Wow... I would have never have thought of that... I have no common sense whatsoever mind you, anyway...

I look forward to end of Asylum how ever you see fit to end it. It has had a great run, and I am proud to call it one of my favorite stories. Keep writing! I'm sure this won't be last piece that I fall in love with ^_^