Ooie, that was quite the amazing story. I thought the description was in depth... maybe a little too in depth since it seemed that sometimes I got a little bored and wanted to know more about the characters instead of the atmosphere.

It was an interesting start and the ending to the story was simply fabulous. You could really get a picture in your head of what Ian was seeing and, to me, that really important. I'd just suggest adding more of maybe what he was feeling as well to accent his visuals.

Great job. I have this on my alerts and hope to read more of it soon.