I like the chapter, that's a horrible way to die.
"staring at once was a living..." I think you mean I think you mean staring at what once was a living. Update soon!

Sounds good so far, I like the ending line.

Its rather dark from the beginning but its lacks description but gives a very plain description of whats going on and you seems to have described the Snet more than the girl which that is what we won't to know. The beginning is good but i was expecting something a little more darker and descritive live the sounds of running foot steps closered up along side the riverbank and out of the mist appear a (description of expressed and apprearance)girl ect but you do have talent i did like reading it.