i thought the story was kinda boring, and it didn't really make sense. nice try tho.

This is wonderful. It starts off very strong, but I don't know if I really believe in his quick agreement to being painted, and the long passage of time while she's painting fails to strike me.

I think it needs to be extended. The end deserves as much attention as the beginning and middle, and it doesn't seem like it really got it.

wow. i like where this is going, please keep writing more.