I agree with you that every citizen should have healthcare, and I believe that you understand just the size of the problem that poses.

Money, it rules the world. Many of the things you have suggested, such as importing Canadian drugs, providing scholarships and incentives for schools, and providing a minimal heath care system nation wide all require vast amounts of money, which, I am presuming, will come from the government. While this is possible, I find that generally to get American money you need to loose something that is already sucking it away.

I truely enjoy this essay and believe that your ideas have viable opitions, and I hope to see your solutions to the problems that these solutions face.

First thing I notice is how incredibly large (and thus uninviting) the fifth paragraph is. A total of 11 lines. That is bad, I'm afraid to say. So please edit and cut it into three :P

I strongly disagree with your point in giving medical students special treatment. Other fields are needed too, for other reasons, and I don't see why they should be getting such special attention. Instead, they should generally aim to ease the costs for uni students, etc.

I do however find that this essay is well constructed and brings good arguments (nice addition with the example of where America turned wrong by denying the Canadian vaccine).

I find this essay to be strong, but you should seriously consider shortening the length of that paragraph I spoke about earlier.

Also, as for structure, I liked that you presented the problem and then neatly lined up solutions (that are agreeable). Health care is important and other countries around the world have different ways of solving it (ie, some have it for free until you become and adult etc).

Well done!

- Frac

This is very good, and I agree. The only thing I had a problem with was the use of 'I' and 'we'. Perhaps that was how it was supposed to be written, obviously I don't know for sure, but most essays are supposed to be written in third person.

For instance, instead of "A third thing we can do is to make private health care more affordable."

You could instead write, "Another thing that can be done is to make private health care more affordable."

But like I said, maybe you were supposed to write it that way; certainly, I have no idea what format your professor gave you. But it was a very good, well thought out essay that made sense and proposed real, doable solutions to very real problems