FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Ramenluver 2007-08-29 ch 1,  | abuseI liked the two begining stanzas, but I think you need a smoother transition to the third stanza. I think I like the image of the cologne the best for no apparent reason, but hey. I'm weird like that. ^_^ -Ramen |
| kloun doll 2007-08-29 ch 1, | abusethe raw imagery is good, the whole poem is interesting by the way. I like the first and last lines. |
| xrho 2007-08-28 ch 1, | abuseThis is wonderful. Beautiful diction, great sensory imagery, and not overly elaborate. Very... finessed. |