Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search Login Register Extras
Reviews For: translucent stains

simpleplan13
2007-11-02
ch 1,
abuseI like the format a lot and the seasons stanza is great.. I also like the last stanza... "forgive..not forget" was a great line
Twister1352
2007-10-17
ch 1, anon.
abuse:) like I said earlier looks professional to me :D

I like the way you described the seasons 2

ether way, powerful poem :D I like it
Princess-anna57
2007-10-10
ch 1,
abuseOh very nicely done. ::) Great! Write on.

~Anna~ ^_^
Ramza the Heretic
2007-10-09
ch 1,
abuseThis poem has a most singular form but it's somewhat well-written especially "spring skies to
summer sorrow
autumn tears like rain,"

Quite a commendable job there.
Aquafied
2007-10-07
ch 1,
abusespring skies to
summer sorrow
autumn tears like rain,

-the autumn doesnt cry here.
review
2007-09-26
ch 1,
abusewow. really full of emotion. good stanza organization...but thats just the mechanics.
its really moving, this poem.
Kissing Concrete
2007-09-17
ch 1,
abusethis is so sad, but beautifully written. at first it bothered me a little that there was no capitalization, but by the time i was finished, i thought it added to the whole theme of the poem. very well written. i like your use of the "forgive and forget" theme as well as using seasons. keep writing!
Charity F
2007-09-14
ch 1,
abuseSimply gorgeous.

Minimal.

Beautiful. You really should publish these. Your writing is something special.
The Postscript
2007-09-06
ch 1,
abuseAstounding. Great job with the alliteration - it adds nicely without being too overbearing. Good writing usually is centered around a development, change, or growth of some kind and it's also nice how you use the seaons to incorporate and aid that a little bit. Also, nice job being sensitive to spacing (e.g. the hyphen in careless and spacing - or lack of - in forgive and forget). All of these techniques are little pointers that help the reader clarify your thoughts and ultimately his own. Keep writing, k.
Davi
2007-09-05
ch 1, anon.
abuseI like how you used the seasons in it. :3
jojoba-music-girl
2007-09-05
ch 1,
abuseI could feel the sadness while reading this. It's so well written! Keep it up!
perpetual questions
2007-09-04
ch 1,
abuseI love how you mix beautiful wording and personal and interpersonal content together. It creates a powerful and intriguing combination. Really great work.
Return to Top