it rhymes it rhymes it rhymes! Sorry, I love rhyming poetry. It reads aloud so well.

Very nice. It isn't as POW with the anguish as some of your others, and I think I like that. It's kinda subtle and people can interpret it how they want. And the use of extended metaphor is quite nice. How'd you like that poetry term there?? Sorry, I'm going nuts with this poetry unit, but I have to say I had more fun reading yours than I did Ms Dickinson's. No offense to her, but she really gets me down. Even though your poems are sad, at least I know you haven't locked yourself in your room for the rest of your life.

Cheers,
H.

I like it. You kept the rhyming subtle. I tend to find rhyming poems too jolly for me to take seriously as dramatic or tragic, but you managed it with this one.