FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| purple x pen 2008-02-07 ch 1,  | abuseoh this is beautiful, i love the tragedy of it all, and sadly, i can relate, amazing work! |
| Kendall Quinn 2007-10-16 ch 1, | abuseI've been looking over your poetry, and I've noticed that it all has a sort of dark energy to it. It's captivating - at once spunky and cynical. It borders being cryptic at times, but you've found a perfect balance between what is hidden and what is revealed. In this poem specifically, I admire the way the italics and parentheses are used. Rather than just being thrown in randomly for visual style, they give the poem a deeper level of meaning - either by pointing out a new way to look at the situation, or just magnifying the tension and emotion. The part that stands out to me the most is at the end of the fourth stanza: [the one that made me his in the first place/ like i'm some sort of a prize] The latter line is so powerful; the bitter irony of it completely shoots the line before it down. You have a very strong poetic voice. The poetry itself is a bit dark - I need to be careful not to read too much at a time (for depression's sake) - but that to me just shows how effective it is. Dark, yet beautiful. Keep up the amazing work. Blessings, KQ |
| Stella Grimshaw. 2007-10-09 ch 1, | abuseI honestly wouldn't change a thing about this, it's so honest and depicts a relationship. How desperate a girl can be for a boy who has no desire to return the amount of adoration she has for him. I loved it times two hundred and three. |
| she smolders 2007-10-01 ch 1, | abuseOh you used dialogue so well to show raw emotions and I just love the ironic tone to this. Take care. |
| ohthevoices 2007-10-01 ch 1, | abuseYour style's a little different than what I usually read, but I loved it, probably because of that. I loved the lines: "and he gave me the most beautiful(ly evil) smile:". Keep it up! |
| call me ish 2007-09-29 ch 1, | abusejesuschrist girl. (this is (the)remix, bytheway, deleted my account &have been ignoring storyalerts up til now but this begsbegsdeserves to be noticed) it's amazing and...just, jeez. you've taken my onceuponatime boy and thrown him and the relationship up on the screen. "and for god's sake, he's always right" (always always) and for god's sake, your writing, it always blows my mind. |
| Kicking Poe 2007-09-29 ch 1, | abuseoh, villainous men! so alluring yet so deadly. nice contrast between love and hate, beauty and evil. cheers. |
| d666lisa 2007-09-28 ch 1, | abuseBrilliant poem :-) |
| RaindropsOnBlackRoses 2007-09-27 ch 1, | abuseWhoa, I LOVED that! I love your style. You should definitely make a book of poems and get it published. I'd buy it. |
| speck and blot 2007-09-27 ch 1, | abusebeautiful poem! why do we love boys so much?? yeats |