Reviews for Rust - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Rust

Kurry 2008-04-09 ch 1, anon.	abuseOh. This rhyme scheme is interesting. Reminds me of Shakespeare for some reason. ^_^ Excellent poem.
Keisha Russell 2007-11-04 ch 1,	abuseYour rhyming is very good. What I like about it is that it's never about the ryhming; that's the last thing I see. When I read it, the story comes first and the meter makes it flow so nicely and then the rhymes, a nice little cherry at the end of each line. For some strange reason I thought the last word was gonna be dust. Speaking of which- sheen of rust? brilliant. Kinda reminds me of when people call a black eye a shiner. Great work Peter, you're really inspiring.
criti-sized 2007-10-13 ch 1,	abuseNice poem as usual. The words in it are good, but messed uo I guess in the sense that it's supposed to be a sad poem. To me it actually gives off more anger than anything. I think, though, that the title doesn't fit the poem. It would sound better with something that indicates at the emotion of the poem, not the result of it... But don't pay attention to me, I'm not much of a poet, so the title probably suits it just fine. C.S.
fairytale failure 2007-10-13 ch 1,	abuseI love the rhthm, it is very bouncy but sad at the same time. I liked the part where you use 'your friends/your ends/errands' to start three lines in a row, it sounds really nice. At the end, you say 'you've covered my heart with a sheen of rust'; are you sure that sheen is the right word for that sentence, I always thought it meant something shiny.