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| simpleplan13 2008-06-14 ch 1,  | abuseI love the idea of a a me make-believe because it's something everyone can relate to and it's interesting. I liked the first stanza a lot too because the descriptions were really beautiful. The rest of it was nice as well. PS. If you're bored check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (link in my profile) |
| spiderfly 2008-03-06 ch 1, | abuseI really liked the imagery all the way through this. I like the idea of being 'wrapped in the letter "A"'. Perhaps some punctuation throughout? Or at least at the end - I think that would make it more punchy. |
| RavenclawDragon 2008-01-17 ch 1, | abuseI loved the middle stanza so much. It's a perfect description of how I feel sometimes. It was absolutely fantastic. ~RM |
| Inflaming Kaliope 2007-12-02 ch 1, | abuse"Sometimes I wish I tasted artistic Like acrylic paint kisses Vintage shoes and sundresses Scarves swirling twirling my hair" Really, really beautiful. And the final line really tops it off. I like the use of no grammar in the middle verse, it just emphasises your point. Awesome! There's no possible criticism I could give this poem. I think it is perfect and it is going in my favourites! |
| the Stranger in the moonlig... 2007-10-25 ch 1, | abuseOf course they do... Its so much easier to deal with make-believe perfection than reality. The lack of grammar in stanza two was great and really hit the point of this poem. Nicely done. ~the Stranger in the moonlight |
| axis.on.a.tilt 2007-10-23 ch 1, | abuse1. You are amazing. 2. "Everyone likes me make-believe better." I like this line. Your entire poem has that beautiful let's-see-what's-hidden-between-the-words feel that I love. |
| the face in the window 2007-10-23 ch 1, | abuseThis is a beautiful poem, as always. Nice job. Rowan. |
| Faithless Juliet 2007-10-23 ch 1, | abuseThere are so many powerful verses and statements in this, and the underlining theme of self (be it ourselves or the self that we show to the world) the whole experience was mesmerizing - for me, it was like walking through me teens again. That struggle to find somekind of truth in what always felt like everyone else's moments. Wonderful job, as always I applaud you. Keep up the good work. Much love, Juliet. |
| painted.music 2007-10-22 ch 1, | abusekonban wa "everyone likes me make-believe better" -- Such a forlorn line to end the poem! ... I'm sorry I'm giving such a crappy review for such an outstanding poem, but I'm so exausted right now, and I still have a ton to do. So -- gute nacht! Zaijen -Shan- |