FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| thecolourgrey 2008-02-06 ch 1,  | abuselovely poem! =D |
| XxBlackChaosxX 2008-02-01 ch 1, | abuseOoh, I like the beginning imagery! But 'vains' is supposed to be VEINS. But your writing in whole is wonderful! It's definitely taking the form of a butterfly! |
| Faith Adeline 2008-01-29 ch 1, | abusesimple, but has a good message behind it. Although vains should be veins. plus, throw in some punctuation now and then so it doesn't look like a long run on sentence. |
| alice is dying 2008-01-28 ch 1, | abuse"River beats/of blood"-that line is fantastic. You've employed some wonderful imagery in this piece, I really enjoyed it! The "smile = a lie" thing is a bit of a cliche, but there is absolutely no way around that (i know from experience) so don't worry about it, it doesn't take away from the uniqueness of the poem. So really, great job. |
| Steel Winged Angel 2008-01-20 ch 1, | abuseNot a bad start. Interesting style. I would love to see this expanded upon. Add more feeling to it. Let it flow. |
| Princess-anna57 2007-11-30 ch 1, | abuseVery powerful poem. Well done, I applaud you. Write on. ~Anna~ ^_^ |
| PocoSnow15 2007-11-08 ch 1, | abuseOh! A mask! That's something I often use to describe myself. I have a mask. I'm hiding behind lies. Everytime I read your poetry it just gets better and better. Keep it up! |
| theatrical rhapsodies 2007-10-26 ch 1, | abuseThis one is also good too, but there could still be something added. Also, I forgot to tell you thank you for your kind reviews, I'm very happy you like my poetry. =] |
| Tytherpol 2007-10-23 ch 1, | abusei think it's really pretty. especially "River beats"--those are really strongly connotative words. the short formating actually didn't bother me as i thought it would when i first glanced at it. it actually sort of helped make the words a little better. anyway, it's a pretty good job. |