FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| jekodama 2008-01-27 ch 1,  | abuseNice, but a bit clichéd in my honest opinion. I feel it's a tad void of emotion, and it doesn't flow easily. Again, beware of your use of punctuation marks, and I think it should be 'than' instead of 'then' in this sentence: "A sharper tongue then a brain" |
| Furusato 2007-11-03 ch 1, | abuseI love how it ended with hope at the end. :] Keep writing! n_n |
| sylvia's syndrome 2007-10-30 ch 1, | abuseWell, self-reflection is never easy so I applaud you for being brave enough to write this. However, I feel like you could say so much more than just these one-word lines. I think this could be improved if you delve deeper and go past these commonly used words. Keep writing! |