so creepy yet so cool

I saw your A/N at the bottom of the chapter saying he was 8 when she died and now he's 12, which is 4 years, but in the chapter you have this line

Just then James seemed to realize the mistake of his first call, “Oh man, I am so sorry! I forgot about Sarah. She was killed on Halloween last year during the full moon right? You don’t have to come over if you don’t want to.”

If it was last year he would only be 9.

oh and yea i read this like... before the christmas break i just completely forgot to review sorry... love ya! keep writing and keep up the good work.

Ohh! this is gonna sound good... *reads instead of studying for exams*

What the -? That's very gory, I had to inhaled deeply in order not to get too caught up with it! (aka incessant nightmares, vomiting). Yeah, I know - girly much?

What in the bloody hell -? You had me scared there!

The story lacks detail. The dialogue needs to be seperated from the paragraphs. Who is Sarah? What does she look like? From what I read, she's in high school or middle school. Describe the things around them. Use the five senses to help with the scenes.

Very creepy of some sorts.

I like the simple writing style of it!

This chapter was creepy! :) Also, I like how quickly you put new chapters up. Usually I have to wait like two weeks for a new one - it's nice to be able to read every other day or so!

A killer who likes for the officials to find the dead body, nice :)

The chapters may be short but they don't have to be. I know I'm not the best writer out there but I can give you a few tips because every writer starts as a beginner.

1. First off, I would definitely separate the dialogue into different paragraphs, running them together makes it more difficult to read.

2. Try describing the scenary, it's nice to know what's going on around them.

3. Definitely describe your characters (looks, personality, etc.) and as far as the serial killer, describe just what he does to his victims and maybe show the pleasure he gets from it.

I hope I have helped, good luck, I'll be reading. :)

Interesting idea. Looking forward to future updates :]

Very nice, I love serial killers who cut up their victims. I can't wait to see what happens.