Huh. Not much of a poem, nor much of a story. More like a blurb. Mistake: "Loosing" needs to be "losing". Personally, I think this is kind of weak. It doesn't leave an impact, and while perhaps the flow is very dreamy and almost mystical, there's not much point, and the ending doesn't really connect. Mostly, it's okay as a blurb, but it doesn't leave much of an impact.

I love the way it flows.
It feels staggered, like quick thoughts throughout a multitude of happenings.

I wrote something about the game of life, but it is a rather different view on the subject.